Rock of Love Charm School vs. Playboy Mansion

It’s sometimes not easy to explain the differences between one Reality TV show and another, even when the differences are obvious.  Side by side, here’s a look at two shows that couldn’t be more different, yet are strangely similar:

Rock of Love Charm School vs. Playboy Mansion’s Girls Next Door

Charm School Cast Dressed in Uniform

1) Bitches in Heat vs. Bunnies in Love

2) Fuchsia Highlights vs. Pampered Peroxide

3) Sharon Osbourne, Headmistress  vs. Hugh Hefner, Headmaster

4) Charm School Pins vs. Playboy Bunny Diamond Necklaces

5) One Girl Eliminated Each Week vs. One (or more) Girls Move in Each Week

6) Censored language vs. Pixilated Body Parts

7) Competition for $100,000 Prize vs. Share Million Dollar Enterprise

The Girls Next Door Share the Love at the Playboy Mansion

8) Bret Michael’s Former Girlfriends vs. Hugh Hefner’s Past, Present,and Future Girlfriends

9) Learn New 10 Commandments vs. Live By The Golden Rule

10) Former Strippers vs. Former Hooters Girls

Although The Girls Next Door have moved on, and “random-ass hoe’s” have moved in, according to Kendra Wilkinson in an interview with Chelsea Handler, viewers will be able to reunite with their favorite Charm School girls on “Rock of Love Bus” premiering January 4th on VH1.

Pj

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Why is Kenley still sewing? {Project Runway}

I more than a little bit baffled as to why Kenley was not sent home over Suade on last night’s episode of Project Runway.  Yes, Suade has been in the bottom two twice, but then Kelli was sent home (in my opinion, too early) without having been the bottom two before the night she was “outed.”  OK Suade’s outfit was “boring,” for a “Rock and Roll” aesthetic, but it was well sewn, and an outfit that is “well executed” (in Nina Garcia’s words) usually wins over the poorly sewn garment.  Remember when Angela kessler’s “streetwalker” (according to guest judge, Ivanka Trump) creation beat out Katherine Gerdes’s simple green dress during the man’s best friend challenge on Season Three?  If Vera Wang hadn’t raved about Angela’s skirt being “beautifully sewn,”  I think Angela would have been out that evening.  And then there was Santino Rice’s dog-doo brown jump suit he had made for Kara Janx.  Although the sleeve fell apart at the shoulder on stage, the guest judge thought the

Don't get "snarky" with Tim!

outfit was original.  But last night, guest judge L L Cool J didn’t get Kenley’s idea of hip-hop at all, so what saved her? Kenley showed that she can not sew a pair of pants; she even said in her interview that her line is “dresses.”  Kenley does Kenley-type clothes well, but the same could be said for the signature looks of several eliminated designers: Stella and her “leatha,” Terri and her pant-suit separates, Keith and his “shredded wear.”  A finalist on Project Runway should be able to versify his or her signature look in a runway collection.  I don’t think Kenley is headed in that direction–and being the first designer on Project Runway to make Tim Gunn feel “snarky” doesn’t help, either.  I can hear Blayne shouting from a tanning booth in Yakima, WA: “Kenley’s just snarklishous!”  Kenely did look amazing as a pop-star last night; her outfit overshadowed her defensive attitude.  Maybe that’s why she still sewing.

PJ

Pam Anderson lets loose on her own reality tv show

Pam Anderson might not be a young beauty, but who cares? Her new reality show, Pam:Girl on the Loose has a little bit of everything. Anderson has managed to cover all of the reality tv basics in the first two episodes. She introduces her staff (cook, assistant, etc.), cooks with her mom, jets off to Vegas with ex-husband Tommy Lee for Hugh Hefner‘s birthday celebration, visits the Playboy mansion, poses for a “fashion shoot” in the nude, and sells off all her worldly possessions at a yard sale to raise money for PETA. These snippets of her life are narrated by Pam from her bathtub and if you you don’t understand what she is saying, she draws little pictures and doodles on the screen–kind of like Blues Clues. I don’t think I can take an entire season of Girl on the Loose, but the first two episodes had a few poignant and humorous moments. Pam goes to Camp Pendleton to help MC a USO show. Riding in a golf cart with Kathy Griffin to the stage Pam asks: Is ZZ Top here?

Kathy:Yes.

Pam: Are any of my ex husbands here?

Kathy: Let me think….no.

Although Pam says she is against war, she reveals that one of her sons loves the Military Channel and appreciates everything the troops are doing. She said that she took him to an Army-Navy Surplus Store and they brought rations and her son cooked dinner from these rations. Obviously she supports his creativity.

Pam sense of humor about herself is refreshing, but if she really wanted to let loose, she would walk around the house without make-up.

PJ

Diddy For President! {I Want to Work for Diddy: The Man, the Myth}

The preview episode for Diddy‘s (aka Sean Combs formerly known as P. Diddy, formerly known as Puff Daddy) latest reality tv show I Want to Work for Diddy: The Man, the Myth reminded me a lot of a presidential campaign–with one exception: I understand what Diddy is talking about. Diddy presents himself as a no-nonsense boss that can get things done. I’m not saying that Diddy can navigate domestic and international political waters, but I haven’t heard much from either Senator McCain nor Senator Obama about what they plan to do. It’s always about what they believe–the rhetoric of beliefs. That said, the upcoming National Conventions will be pretty boring. (Exception: How is Hillary Clinton going to ask the Democratic Party to support Senator Obama when she argued so vehemently against him? Stay tuned!) Here are some quotes from Diddy that would liven up the conventions:

It’s a hard mother f****ing job, but somebody’s got to do it.

To succeed in anything in life you need a vision. If you can’t see the forest through the trees, you need to chop them mother f****ers down.

If you gave it you’re all, that’s the kind of performance I judge. I judge your heart. You got to go hard or go home.

I want my dreams to come true, but not in a selfish way. I want other people’s dreams to come true, too.

Sleep is forbidden. When I’m working, I’m a machine and I don’t look at other people like they are human.

You got to be able to make a way out of no way.

I sometimes feel sorry for people that don’t work for me, ‘cuz I know they not be having as much fun.

PJ

Future network change looms over Project Runway

I miss the more serene Heidi

The first two episodes of Season Five of Project Runway are over and already Heidi Klum looks a little tired. The usual perky, fashionably dressed and impeccably styled host and executive producer appears a little too thin and stressed out. Season 5 has a trying-too-hard-to-live-up-to-past-season’s vibe; the format is the same, but you can tell things have changed. This will be the last season aired on Bravo TV. Season 6 will be aired on the Lifetime Network and produced in LA (supposedly the geographical change works out better for Klum). Will the New York based supporting cast follow Klum? I can’t imagine Project Runway without Nina Garcia, Michael Kors, or especially Tim Gunn. Will the ultimate prize still be a runway show at Bryant Park? NYC is the perfect backdrop for fashion designers–can LA live up to it? I would love to see previous LA based designers Kara Saun, Santino Rice, and Jeffery Sebelia make appearances. What I’m afraid of is that the show will pander to the Red Carpet culture rather than fashion editors. Also, isn’t Lifetime “television for women?” Since when did Project Runway become a show “for women?”

As for the first two episodes: no one has stepped forward as the official a-hole, yet. In my opinion, two talented designers have been sent home already. I really thought Blayne would be the first one out with his walking Depends Undergarment creation, but Blayne is a “character.” He reminds me of Kato Kaelin’s gay cousin. In the last episode he called Heidi “Darth Vader” because she dressed in black. (Heidi had called Blayne’s diaper-chic “butt ugly”–ouch). But then Blayne changed his mind and called Heidi “Darth-licious” in a manner that evoked the spirit of the great Christian Siriano. Also, guest judge Natalie Portman plugged her new vegan shoe line. I’ve been buying “vegan shoes” for years at Payless. I’m so ahead of my time.

Kato or Blayne?

PJ

Artist’s achieves American Dream on Groomer Has It

Artist (top left) wins over tough competition

Artist Knox became the first to win title Groomer of the Year on Animal Planet’s Groomer Has It. The final challenge was was a 10 hour marathon grooming session where Artist and Jonathan had to groom 7 dogs, one from each of the AKC’s groups: Sporting, Non-Sporting, Working, Herding, Toy, Hound, and Terrier. As usual, there was not an even playing field as the dogs were chosen for the groomers “at random” (with the exception of the first dog whom Artist got to pick). Although the final judging was set up to look like a dog show ring, Artist and Jonathan didn’t necessarily have to do “show cuts.” Judge Vinny taught me the new term “pet groom” as in, “The dog looks OK for a pet groom.” Artist and Jonathan both received help from Kathleen and Will. It was nice to see that Kathleen could be happy in a non dominatrix role, and it was fun to see Will annoy Jonathan. One of the highlights of the finale was to see Jonathan and Artist reunited with their loved ones (dogs included). I think what did Jonathan in was his dirty Labrador Retriever.

I really enjoyed the pre-view show which included a little “pop-up” Nemo who gave background info. Nemo always looked like such a well trained Yorkie, but lo and behold, Jai’s little pooch is not potty trained. Nemo also had an assistant who I hope was paid well. The never-been-seen-before scenes were funny. My instincts about the judges were right Vinny and Doc can’t stand each other. In one scene, they stopped rolling because of a noise that sounded like a helicopter, to which Vinny remarked, “There’s your broom” to Doc. Also, Jai is a scripted host, so scripted that at one point, he forgot the line “groomer of the year.”

I started watching this show because it was entertaining, but I also ended up learning a lot, too. I’ll definetly be back for season two!

PJ

“They shall not grow old…” {Memorial Day}

They shall grow not old

As we that are left grow old

Age shall not weary them

Nor the years condemn

At the going down of the sun.

And in the morning

We shall remember them.

By: Laurence Binyon