Hell’s Kitchen has become boring

June 25, 2008

Hell’s Kitchen has become boring as the season comes to a close. Ramsey’s rants, chefs preparing the same menu for dinner services, and the dwindlinging variety of personalities, are making the remaining episodes quite tedious and anti-climatic. Now that there are only three left (Jenn left last week because she was slow and whined too much), Ramsey has brought in his own sous chefs to perform a haphazard job in the kitchen on purpose. Corey was sent home in the end because she could not imitate Chef Ramsey’s method of telling the chef’s how they are f***ing up the meat orders. I’m looking forward to the finale next week because Ramsey is bringing back former crazy chefs to help (or hurt) Christina and Petrozza. I predict Petrozza will win the job as Executive Chef. I think Christina is too young and unseasoned (pun intended) to run a restaurant. It will be fun to see if she can win Ramsey over: she’s already been on several “reward” dates with him for winning individual challenges. I will say that this week’s epsode had a funny moment: A voiceover of Corey saying that had to prove that she wasn’t a dumb blond as we see her disrobing down to her bra and panties before trying to get Louross to get into the hot tub with her!

PJ

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Christina wins Hell’s Kitchen

June 19, 2008

I really thought Petrozza had a chance until the two finalists had to work with former cast-chefs and prepare a dinner service. The less experienced Christina was not only more organized than Petrozza, but was able to negotiate her crew’s diverse personalities. For example–she asked Matt to make his award winning risotto. That kept Matt on task for awhile. The largest challenge for the finalists was getting the losing chefs to help them win, when most of them didn’t care. The funniest chef was Jenn, whose eyes were bulging out of her head with jealousy. She did try to help Petrozza, though, by trying to get him to organize a menu and dinner service plan. But Petrozza crashed and burned. I could tell it was all over when he was organizing asparagus pieces in “X” shapes around the plates while the entrees got cold. The turning point of the show was Ramsey talking quietly (for once) like a golf tournament announcer before Christina and Petrozza turned the handle to walk through the door to their future (gag). What a nightmare to not be able to open that door! In the end, Ramsey chose Christina because of her “potential.” I should have seen it coming when Christina started to refer to Ramsey as “Gordon.” I guess Ramsey thought he couldn’t mold Petrozza into executive chef material, and for that reason alone I am glad Petrozza will remain Petrozza and not a Ramsey clone.


Chef Bobby sent home for lack of Beef Skills {Hell’s Kitchen}

June 16, 2008

Communication was key in Hell’s Kitchen last week, and it was Bobby who ultimately failed. The fact that Bobby “cremated” rather than cooked the Beef Wellington, according to Chef Ramsey, didn’t help him either. The final four chefs had an individual “cooking school” challenge–teaching a non-cooking, scantily clad housewives how to prepare homemade pasta with fresh lobster and sauce. Christina came out on top with Corey, a close second. Chrisitina, a Culinary School student, probably had an advantage here. Petrozza and Bobby were too distracted by their students’ large melons to focus on the tasks at hand, and Jen struggled with letting her student prepare the meal without interference.

Neither Jenn nor Corey were happy for Christina (surprise). Jenn said, “I just wanted to booty-bounce her across the room.” Again, cleaning Hell’s Kitchen was the punishment. Hell’s Kitchen is gross, and this week we got to see the black crusty bits in the fryer and the ice cream scoop stuck in chocolate. The chef’s made it through dinner service and Chef Ramsey targeted Bobby to harass, but Jenn also felt the heat. For once I felt that Jenn didn’t deserve the wrath of Ramsey, but she made the mistake of sticking up for herself–a big no-no because to Ramsey, sticking up for oneself means questioning King Gordon.

Both Christina and Corey would have liked to have seen Jen go home, but at least Jen can cook a decent Beef Wellington.

PJ


Matt, Louross, and Jenn crash and burn in Hell’s Kitchen

May 28, 2008

Chef Jenn looks so sweet in this photograph, but her teammates saw a different side this week. Jenn managed to lose the first challenge by not putting sauce on two of the dishes. For their punishment, the Blue Team had to become a maintenance crew and scrub the outside of the restaurant. Lourross tried to lighten the mood by pulling his work outfit over his head to which Jenn said, “You’re stupid and you got a wedgie.” Bobby thought Jenn was being bossy and said the quote of the week: “I come in peace, but if you break my sanctuary, you will feel it.”

Both teams completed dinner service (barely) this week, but still managed to gross-out Chef Ramsey and his guests. Petrozza was busted for putting dirty lettuce leaves in a shrimp cocktail. Louross sent out raw steak, prompting Chef Ramsey to cry, “Raw Steak!!!” and round up the Blue Team to come over and “feel the meat.” Is this what really goes on in a restaurant kitchen, or just a TV kitchen?

Matt wins the gross-out award for letting sweat from his forehead drip into pasta water (Ramsey said that was the reason the customers were sending the appetizers back for being too salty). Matt tied a dinner napkin around his head to try to fix the problem, but Ramsey just made fun of him for wearing a diaper around his head and acting like a baby. “This is not The Simpsons, Homer,” he said to Matt after the dinner service. Cory begged Matt to “cook like a normal person,” but nothing helped.

Meanwhile, Jenn undercooked her first dessert which prompted Ramsey to tell her to “F*** Off!”

Ramsey let Petrozza pick two teammates for elimination as well as choose which one of them should go home. Petrozza chose Louross for his lack of skills. Then Ramsey called Matt and Jenn forward and told them to take off their jackets and switch teams because he was “unconvinced by the both of them.”

To Jenn: “you may be able to manipulate your team, you can’t manipulate me.”

To Matt: “You’re lucky to be here. Look around. You’re out of your depth.”

Needless to say, neither team was happy about this switch.

But as usual, Gordon had the last word: “Louross was never short on energy. He was just short…(pause)…on cooking skills.”

From the previews it looks like Matt becomes even crazier next week. I predict Ramsey will eliminate Matt or Jenn (or both) next week.

PJ


The best of both Davids {American Idol}

May 19, 2008

For the next two nights we’ll see the best of both Davids: David Archuleta is young, cute, and has those dreamy eyes. In my day, he’d be on the cover of Tiger Beat magazine with the caption, “Win a date with David” and “Inside, new David Archuleta trading cards–collect all 25!” David Archuleta looks like an American Idol. Yes, he’s a good singer, too. But the future of American Idol depends on fans wanting to watch American Idol, and David Archuleta is just the guy whose wholesome good looks can whip fans into a frenzy. I don’t think David Cook has that kind of charisma. He’s older, has an established style, and can play an instrument. He’s got the Zac Efron bangs going for him, but that’s not enough; David Cook has to play his music and sing to inspire his audience. His maturity and raw talent will help him establish a long lasting recording career, but they won’t make him an American Idol. I believe David Cook will go on to be memorable, like Carrie Underwood and Kelly Clarkson. Each finalist has a promising future, but I believe David Archuleta should become an American Idol first. American Idol has already launched David Cook’s career this season, he doesn’t need the title, nor would he represent brand as well as David Archuleta. Be sure to tune in.

PJ


Chef Matty’s in heaven on Hell’s Kitchen

May 14, 2008

Chef Matt Sigel soared high above Hell’s Kitchen this week, far from the the Blue Team and Wrath of Ben. After beating Ben in a blind taste test challenge and securing a win for the Red Team, Matt thoroughly enjoyed watching Ben, “getting his ass kicked tonight.” Matt did not hold back his comments: “You can’t cook, buddy” and “I love it when Karma bites you in the ass.” Matt was proud that Ramsey said his risotto was “the best risotto ever served in Hell’s Kitchen.” But Matt couldn’t have been happier when Chef Ramsey found out that Ben didn’t have the lamb ready:

Ramsey: What’s on that ticket? Come on!

Ben: 6:30

Ramsey: What time is it now?

Ben: 8:00

What were they doing for an hour and a half? The Blue Team couldn’t get it together, and aside from Louross working hard at the salad station, Ramsey watched the rest of the men go down in flames. Ben didn’t help by telling Ramsey he “couldn’t work in this system”; ironic because it was Ben who spearheaded the men’s system of incompetence.

I give the guests on the Blue side a lot of credit for their patience and tolerance. Some walked out the door, but one women broke out a Breakfast Bar and remarked, “This is really embarrassing, you know? I don’t want to have to eat a snack at a restaurant.”

In the end, neither kitchen completed their dinner service, but it was the men’s team who lost. Ben continued scheming by asking everyone to nominate themselves. This strategy worked for Petrozza whose “level of maturity” won praise from Ramsey, but it backfired on Ben and he was sent home.

Meanwhile, Ramsey asked someone from the Red Team to volunteer to move over to the blue team for the next challenge. Corey wants Matt to return; she’s been gunning for Matt since he switched teams. During the Red Team’s reward (spa treatments), she openly told Matt, “You’re the next to go.” But Matt didn’t let Corey get to him; from under his chocolate face-mask and cucumber slices, he reminded her that it was he who helped them win. Then he told the women (strategically, I think) that he only cared if Ben went home first. No one enjoyed the spa treatments more than Matt who was even served iced tea by Ben.

This week Jen and Rosann both faltered during the dinner service, but Ramsey singled out Jen to receive his Navy Seal training techniques. Jen was dumbfounded and went through a whole range of emotions, but her funniest comment was: “Chef Ramsey, he got it out for me. He supposedly likes vocal people. He want a leader, he wants somebody to stand down. Now I guess he on his period or whatever today, so he gets pissed off at me when I try to be vocal and be the leader.”

(Above: The drama continues with chefs Matt, Corey, & Jen)

PJ


Bear Grylls is trying hard to be an anti-role model {Best Week Ever}

May 10, 2008

National Geographic Discovery Channel has lawsuit waiting to happen with Man vs. Wild. Host Bear Grylls’s gross-out appeal is just made for bored tween-aged boys needing another excuse to injure insects and animals. I can hear it now: “Hey dad, the Beaver and I are going outside to play Man vs. Wild. It’s OK, Dad, it’s the Discovery Channel.”

As highlighted on VH1’s Best Week Ever:

Adam Winer (writer): Bear went on to cook more bugs, cut off fish heads, stab a frog into a tree, and dig into a rotting carcass.

Bear: This should be cooked, but it’s not the time nor the place to start a fire!

John Mulaney (comedian): No. this is a good time to start a fire; when you have raw meat, it’s the best time.

Paul Scheer: (actor/comedian): But like all bindgers, all that eating caught up with him and…wow…yikes!

Bear: I think I have to stop here for two seconds; this diarrhea is not waiting for anyone.

PJ: Lovely. I don’t get it. He’s not a contestant in a game show, he can’t possibly be making a documentary, so what’s his point? I’m not impressed with Mr. Bear.

Moving on and lightening up– a highlight of this week’s Best Week Ever was Brooke White , an American Idol eliminated contestant, parodying herself with an infomercial, “Brooke White: Stop and Sing the Classics,” which was as good, if not better, than a Saturday Night Live sketch! Brooke’s ability to laugh at herself is worthy of a role model!

PJ


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